On giving thanks

“Do not turn away what is given to you, nor reach out for what is given to others…give thanks for what has been given you. However little. Be pure, never falter.” – Dhammapada

As Thanksgiving approaches, I am reminded of what I am most grateful for: my wife, our dogs, our family, our friends, our home, our health, and the life we have built. 

I am also most thankful for my readership, no matter how small. I truly hope you have found these pages enlightening and inspiring, that they have helped you think about your experiences in a different way. At the very least, I hope you’ve liked the pictures.

Thanksgiving marks the start of the holiday season. It can be a time of gratitude and reflection, or a time of restless want and missed expectations. I hope you remember that you have a choice in the matter and I wish you well as you enter the season.

On Wishlists

“Beware of thirstiness lest your wishes become desires and desire binds you.” – the Dhammapada (Desire)

“The more I have the more I think I’m almost where I need to be. If only I could get a little more.” - the Avett Brothers (Ill with want)

For most of the year, aside from the occasional bike or dog related product, I am fortunate enough to want for very little. In short, I want what I have and have what I want.

Then the ever expanding “Holiday season” comes upon us. It starts with the request for a wish list, which usually takes awhile for me to produce because it’s hard for me to think of things I want when I actually have everything that I want…until I’m forced to spend some time thinking about it…

It starts out modest…a pair of gloves, a set of tire covers for the camper, perhaps some headphones…

There’s the daily tweaking and expansion of the list (damn you Amazon Wish Lists for making it so easy!) until finally we end up with some high ticket items…

…high ticket, somewhat easy to rationalize items, like $150 running pants (ok, tights) that promise to improve performance, prevent injury, and aid recovery...

…which morphs until things like Kindles (damn you Amazon again, for your incessant marketing) and Wii games (for the high ticket item I didn’t need from a previous year)…

…and constant thoughts about what else should be in the list and what priority it should be…

…and the noticing of all of the things around the house that are no longer shiny and new…

…and then there is no way that you are going to get everything on your list because you got so greedy, but it’s on your list, so after the holidays, no matter how generous your family has been, there are still some things that you now “need” and so you spend money that could have been saved for the inevitable furnace repair or vet visit…

…but thankfully pretty early in the process I’ve caught myself and toned it down a bit…

…and have tried to focus on the practical and reasonably priced things…

…and maybe next year, my list can look like this:

1. Inner peace

2. Good health

3. Gratitude

4. A 56 Inch Internet Ready 3D HD LCD TV

On maintaining your criteria

“Do not make light of your failings, saying, ‘what are they to me?’ A jug fills drop by drop, so the fool becomes brimful of folly. Do not belittle your virtues, saying ‘they are nothing.’ A jug fills drop by drop, so the wise man becomes brimful of virtue.” – The Dhammapada

In agility, there are obstacles basically made from wooden planks that have yellow sections on both the point of entry and the point of exit. These yellow zones are known as contacts. The entry contact is called the up contact. The exit contact is the down contact. Depending on the venue you are competing in, the dog usually is required to touch the up contact and always is required to touch the down contact.
Touching the down contact has historically been a challenge for Team Maebe. We actually spent the better part of a year working on just that behavior, which she now understands, but has deteriorated during competition over time.
How did that happen? I was sloppy with my criteria.
Here is what she was supposed to do:
Run to the bottom of the obstacle with rear paws on the end of the contact and her front paws on the ground in front of the contact and stay there until released.
Here is what I allowed her to do over a long period of time:
In the excitement of competition, in going for what I wanted today vs what I wanted for good, the releases became shorter and shorter until there were none.
The consequence: Eventually that turned into missing the down contact all together.
So what did I do?
1. Acknowledged what I had done to cause the problem.
2. Made a commitment to accept nothing less than my criteria, which means:

a. If the rules of the particular run allow you to repeat the obstacle, I redo it until she gets it right.
b. If the rules of the particular run do not allow you to repeat, then I end the run.

3. Followed through on that commitment
The result:
Maebe missed her next contact. I made her run it again. She realized I was holding her to her criteria. She did not miss any contacts the rest of the trial.
The lesson:
Hold true to your criteria. If you make compromises regarding what is important to you long term in order to make a short term gain, you won’t achieve what you really want.