On Rabid Bicycle Haters From Hell

“’Look how he abused me and beat me, how he threw me down and robbed me.’ Abandon such thoughts and live in love.” – Dhammapada: Choices

“Look to your own faults, what you have done or left undone. Overlook the faults of others.” Dhammapada: Flowers

“Never speak harsh words for they will rebound upon you and the hurt rebounds.” Dhammapada: Violence

Over the weekend Dharmaspoon Gal and I went on a bike ride to Hell. On the way there, a woman passed us, rolled down her window and proceeded to rant at us as she passed by. We caught up to her at an intersection, where she once again rolled down her window and as she turned and drove away, continued to shout at us.

Neither of us actually heard anything that she was saying. When she passed, it was too windy to hear. When she was pulling away at the intersection, she was just out of earshot. What you could tell was the angry seething tone of the message.

There were a couple of ways that one or both of us could reacted. In the past, I would have been caught up in her anger and at least have been angry right back, perhaps responding with a gesture or comment of my own. I probably would have let it ruin the ride for me. Instead we did the following:

1. We looked  to see if there was anything we did to trigger the tirade. For example, were we in her way or breaking the law with our riding? The law requires that bicyclists stay as far to the right as is practical and in some towns you cannot ride two-abreast. We were riding on a wide shoulder and single file. We were easy to pass. There was no oncoming traffic. We couldn’t think of anything we could have done differently. It’s possible she didn’t like the bike shorts or shirts, but, at that point, what can you do?

2. We felt compassion for the woman. To be on that short of a fuse must be sad. Who knows what is going on in her life that the mere presence of cyclists could set her off.

3. We let it go. It was an instant relief to just let it go. To not get worked up or pissed off. The one thing in common with road rage incidents involving bicyclists is that the bicyclist engages the angry individual and there is an escalation. Often the driver is looking to start something. It’s best not to give them a reason.

You don’t have to be biking to have something similar happen to you. You could be running, driving, standing in line at the grocery store, minding your own business at the bar, and for whatever reason, someone can start something with you.  Let it go. If you have to, defend yourself. Whatever you do, don’t escalate. Let cooler heads prevail.