On Honking at Old Ladies

“The fool in his mischief forgets and he lights the fire in which one day he must burn.” – The Dhammapada

Yes, the dharmaspoon guy has stooped to posting a viral video to illustrate a point. A nice example of cause and effect. And for you skeptics, you are correct, this was staged. Part of a Swedish ad campaign for IKEA., apparently.

On Being Unplugged

“Do not live in the world, in distraction and false dreams…” – The Buddha

I biked to work this morning, like I do most mornings. This morning was a hot one, with the day predicted to get even hotter.

I climbed the three flights of stairs to my floor, sweating more than I care to think about given the absence of showers at my place of business.

I satdown in my chair and was about to “wake up” my sleeping laptop when I noticed this:

That is a picture of the empty dock where I was expecting my laptop to be.

Suddenly, I remembered where it was. I had worked from home yesterday and had managed to leave it there today. It was, ironically, in the same cabinet as my bike bag. In fact, I had to move the laptop out of the way this morning in order to get to it.

I contemplated biking back home, but the time required and the heat of the day compelled me to stay put. It was then that I started to wonder what a work day (well half a day, because I bike home for lunch) would be like without a computer.

I thought about what I use my computer for: email, setting up meetings, creating documents and searching for things on the internet. Yes, there’s the occasional Facebook, shopping and trip planning, but really, the bulk of my time is spent doing work.

No doubt, the computer is helpful, and I could not do my job without it. It does, however, have a downside; it demands constant attention and provides quite a lot of distraction; it encourages multi-tasking and the associated problem of doing a mediocre and inefficient job at many different things as opposed to focusing on doing a good job one task at a time. The biggest problem is that constantly being on the computer puts you in a reactive state of mind. You end up spending your time responding instead of thinking.

On this morning without a computer I have re-read my personal mission statement, values, roles and goals. I have reviewed my work objectives and have planned what I want to accomplish over the next week.  I am handwriting the draft of this very post with  a pen on paper and when I have my laptop back, I will type and publish it.  I am spending time thinking about what I want to accomplish and how I want to accomplish it.  Al in all, it has actually been a productive morning. 

Had to wrap this post up though because my smartphone was flashing that I had a message…

On Surrendering Your Beliefs

“The master surrenders his beliefs…” – the Buddha

When I read this passage, it made me think about how we often go through life based on assumptions about how things are or how they should be, and how little we question those beliefs, even when faced with evidence to the contrary.

It also made me think about an experience we had with our border collie puppy when we presented him with a new toy, a Kong Wobbler. The way it works is that you fill it with kibble and the dog is supposed to figure out that it needs to knock it until the kibble comes out of a small hole in the side.

This video, which is posted on my wife’s blog as well, is a prime example of what I’m talking about. Cadence has been taught the concept of indirect access…if he wants something, he can offer a behavior in order to get it instead of just running up and taking it directly. We encourage that behavior because it helps keep him safe and thinking. It is, however, only one way he can interact with the world. Another way is through the learning of actions and consequences. In this video, Cadence has to drop his belief that this is an indirect access exercise and figure out that instead that his task is actually to interact with the object in order to figure out what actions of his result in the consequence of kibble coming out. It was a joy to watch this process. I hope you think so too.

On Aspiration vs Expectation

This is Maebe. She is World Team fast. This has been a blessing and a challenge. A blessing because her natural drive, speed, intensity and love of the sport means she is capable of extraordinary things.  A challenge because it has also meant that I had no other option but to learn how to play the sport properly and to build the partnership necessary to compete as a team. I am actually very thankful for this challenge because it has forced me to become a better trainer and a better dog owner;  it has forced Maebe to learn to think on her own, to maintain focus, to figure things out.

Given our potential as a team, and some of our accomplishments in the couple of years we have been competing, I have to be diligent in not confusing my aspirations for the two of us with my expectations.

Charlotte Joko Beck says that Aspiration is “Our own true nature seeking to realize and express itself.” When I think if the journey that Maebe and I are on, it is one in which I want to enable us to develop as a team to the best of our ability.

Expectation is something different. It is built on ego. It is the voice that says, to quote Ricky Bobby, the fictional race car driver, “If you’re not first, you’re last.” It is the disappointment in not getting the Double Q; the bitterness over the dropped bar; the dissatisfaction with qualifying but not placing.

I was recently at a trial where I saw several different handlers pull their dogs off because of an off-course (which was due to poor handling). There were some handlers who packed up and left because they didn’t qualify after their first run. These handlers were clearly caught up in their expectations.

At the same trial, I saw handlers happy with their runs, regardless of whether the qualified or placed. Some of these handlers I have known for years and have witnessed their journey from having dogs they could barely control to becoming a team. I am on that same journey. What we have in common is that we all aspire to do the best we can, to learn from our mistakes, and to always keep in mind that regardless of the success or failure that we experience at a particular moment, we can always be satisfied.

On Reward and Punishment

“Reward and punishment is the lowest form of education” - Chuang Tzu
In our society, we place a lot of emphasis on rewards and punishment, especially, especially punishment.  We incarcerate the highest percentage of our population of any other nation. More than 1 in 37 Americans are currently incarcerated. In animal training, despite over 30 years of building scientific evidence that the technology of operant conditioning (in which the animal/person chooses a behavior that leads to a desirable consequence), this method is still a hard sell, as the idea that people/animals need to be controlled/dominated remains engrained.
The problem with the concept of reward and punishment is that it is determined by an outside force (God,  a parent, a dog owner, a police officer) that judges the behavior and then administers the reward/punishment.
In contrast choice and consequences empowers the individual person/animal to engage in a behavior, see what the consequences are, and then decide if the behavior is worth repeating.
We’ve been training our puppy lately to sit calmly on a mat during mealtime. We do not drag him to the mat, force him into a down, and yell at him if he gets up. We also do not start out with a pile of treats on the mat to lure him there and then every time he gets up, lure him back with more treats. Instead, we set up a situation where it is easy for him to choose to get on the mat, when when he chooses to do so, he gets a treat. He has quickly learned that the consequence of going to his mat is that there is a chance he will get a treat. He consistently chooses to go there.
I am personally drawn to Buddhism because it is about individual choices and the consequences of these choices. I can choose to let things bother me(or not). I can choose to do things I regret (or not).  My happiness is a direct result of my thoughts and actions, not by some outside force. This is what works for me. This is why I am a strong believer in positive training instead of punishment.
I choose to write this blog, not because of the possible reward of a “following.” Indeed, according to the latest statistics, I get about 1 reader a week who is not my wife or me. I write it because I enjoy the act of writing it and because I hope that I am able to offer perhaps a new way of looking at some of the things I think we all deal with.

Observations on three types of people who do stuff with their dogs

It is you who must make the effort. The masters only point the way. – The Buddha
If you don’t have the time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over? – John Wooden
After 9 years of having dogs, this is the first year I am really starting to understand (A) what I am doing doing right, (B) what I am doing wrong (and what to do about it), and (C), what I need to be doing.
During this time I have become part of a larger community of people who like to do things with their dogs.  In some cases, I have been participating in the same activities with the same group of people and their dogs year after year. I have taken countless training classes, watched many training videos, attended many training seminars, read many books.
Recently, it has all started to sink in and I am taking my training much more seriously, working much more consistently, and having both positive results and fun in the process.
Among our cohort of dogs and handlers, I have noticed three groups:
1. Those who continue to learn, train, and develop their relationships with their dogs. This group focuses on getting it right, knowing that it will lead to results.
2. Those who dabble in training or thinking about training and just get by. These dogs do some to most of what they’re asked some or most of the time and never really seem to improve. This group focuses on getting results, often taking shortcuts that make it hard to perform consistently (or consistently well). These shortcuts only take the handler so far and in fact, end up costing time.
3. Those who do not take the time to train and while they love their dogs, are often frustrated by them and either do not understand why nothing is changing or why the dogs don’t just “get it” after all these years. 
If you’re in the third group, use your frustration to motivate you to learn more. Find the people who do well and find out what they’re doing that you’re not.
If you’re in the second group, practice what you know. Learn what you don’t. There are no shortcuts.
If you’re in the first group, share what you know, learn from those who know more than you, and remember that your work is never done.

On Rabid Bicycle Haters From Hell

“’Look how he abused me and beat me, how he threw me down and robbed me.’ Abandon such thoughts and live in love.” – Dhammapada: Choices

“Look to your own faults, what you have done or left undone. Overlook the faults of others.” Dhammapada: Flowers

“Never speak harsh words for they will rebound upon you and the hurt rebounds.” Dhammapada: Violence

Over the weekend Dharmaspoon Gal and I went on a bike ride to Hell. On the way there, a woman passed us, rolled down her window and proceeded to rant at us as she passed by. We caught up to her at an intersection, where she once again rolled down her window and as she turned and drove away, continued to shout at us.

Neither of us actually heard anything that she was saying. When she passed, it was too windy to hear. When she was pulling away at the intersection, she was just out of earshot. What you could tell was the angry seething tone of the message.

There were a couple of ways that one or both of us could reacted. In the past, I would have been caught up in her anger and at least have been angry right back, perhaps responding with a gesture or comment of my own. I probably would have let it ruin the ride for me. Instead we did the following:

1. We looked  to see if there was anything we did to trigger the tirade. For example, were we in her way or breaking the law with our riding? The law requires that bicyclists stay as far to the right as is practical and in some towns you cannot ride two-abreast. We were riding on a wide shoulder and single file. We were easy to pass. There was no oncoming traffic. We couldn’t think of anything we could have done differently. It’s possible she didn’t like the bike shorts or shirts, but, at that point, what can you do?

2. We felt compassion for the woman. To be on that short of a fuse must be sad. Who knows what is going on in her life that the mere presence of cyclists could set her off.

3. We let it go. It was an instant relief to just let it go. To not get worked up or pissed off. The one thing in common with road rage incidents involving bicyclists is that the bicyclist engages the angry individual and there is an escalation. Often the driver is looking to start something. It’s best not to give them a reason.

You don’t have to be biking to have something similar happen to you. You could be running, driving, standing in line at the grocery store, minding your own business at the bar, and for whatever reason, someone can start something with you.  Let it go. If you have to, defend yourself. Whatever you do, don’t escalate. Let cooler heads prevail.